In a recent podcast, a well-known theologian and reform-baptist John Piper answered a difficult question about forgiving past abusive parents.
“Pastor John, how can I forgive my parents?” they asked.
I’ve been a Christian for seventeen years but struggle with forgiveness of my parents for my abusive childhood. I know that the Lord teaches forgiveness, as does the Bible in many passages. I’m able to forgive others injustices and wrongs, but I really struggle with memories of my childhood. It brings resentment to mind,” they added.
Piper, who answers difficult questions in his podcast ‘Ask Pastor John,’ responded with three suggestions that would help the person move towards a place of forgiveness.
The three facts Piper pointed out were: the Lord has forgiven you, the one who judges justly, and bitterness hurts us most.
Before he gave the suggestions, Piper pointed out that in order to forgive, they must “being able and willing to forgive grows out from the root of being forgiven.”
“… when I feel most guilty at the horror of my own sin against God and against Jesus, and when I feel most amazed at my own forgiveness, and most stunned at the magnitude of what it cost in Jesus’ suffering, I am least likely to be angry at those moments with those who have wronged me,” Piper said.
Piper first pointed out that it is important to think about the forgiveness that God gave to us freely and the gravity of it.
“My suggestion is to linger long and deep over the cost, the hope, the preciousness, and the amazing wonder of being forgiven at the cost of Christ’s life,” he said.
He further pointed out that a good way to deal with justice is by “roll[ing] that over onto the judge who judges justly.”
“You don’t have to bear the awful weight of being the judge and the avenger yourself. You can trust that justice will be done,” he added.
Piper pointed out that either justice will take place, or “will have happened on the cross. Sinners will bear it, or Christ will bear it.”
“You cannot improve upon the justice of God in Christ’s crucifixion or in Hell,” Piper added.
Lastly, Piper argued that “an unforgiving spirit hurts you more than anyone,” and that “it does a lot of harm to you and not to others.”
Last year, popular Christian author and speaker Joyce Meyer opened up about how her father abused her as a child and how she was able to forgive him.
In May, on the same podcast, Piper answered the question: “Should a gay couple, once converted, stay married?”
“No, I would not recommend that two men or two women living together, practicing homosexuality, remain in that relationship,” Piper began. “The reasons are several.”
As previously reported by Faithwire, Piper explained that while heterosexual couples can enter into a marriage in a way that goes against the Bible, they can make decisions to change that. When it comes to homosexual couples, they can’t change anything about their relationship to move it in a Biblical direction because at the basis, it is wrong.
“A marriage is a matter of covenant faithfulness between a man and a woman” Piper said. “Therefore, I would encourage that couple to repent of what they did wrong and to ask for forgiveness and to consecrate their union, which, though it should not have happened, may nevertheless be holy before the Lord.”