A former adult film actress is sharing her powerful journey out of the porn industry and into faith.
Bree Solstad said she was “self-centered,” focused on her career, and looking to enjoy life before embracing Christ and joining the Catholic Church.
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“I cared for my loved ones, and every now and then I would speak to God — mainly if I needed something,” she told CBN News. “It was that one-way kind of relationship.”
Solstad’s journey is particularly head-turning due to her previous career in porn, which she abandoned after finding faith.
Before entering the adult film industry, she said she lacked direction and was drinking a lot, living a reckless lifestyle, and engaging in promiscuity. Her situation presented a perfect storm of sorts — one ripe for her to jump into such a diabolical industry.
“I was working at dead-end jobs, and nothing really meant that much to me,” Solstad said. “And I was at a place that was pretty much perfect for a woman who reached out and suggested that I would be really good at what she was doing, which was: pornography.”
She said the decision to enter into pornography was an easy one at the time, considering what was happening in her life. Solstad simply didn’t have any internal — or external — voices holding her back.
“There also wasn’t anyone within my life … who told me, ‘Don’t do this,'” Solstad said. “There were friends who left because of it, but that just made me even more, like, righteous of ‘How dare you judge me.'”
Watch her tell her story:
Solstad dove in and began to make money and command attention, assuming she had reached success. Eventually, though, it all came crumbling down.
“I did this for 10 years, and … I’ve said previously that eventually you just feel trapped,” she said. “In a sense that, you’ve been doing this for so long and what are you going to do now?”
Many adult film stars who feel stuck begin to wonder how they’ll explain away the years they worked in the industry, especially when seeking normal employment opportunities. Filling in those blanks without divulging what went on seems insurmountable.
“What am I going to write on my resume that I’ve been doing for the last 10 years?” she said, noting there were other factors that plagued her. “Psychologically, also, it weighs on you, because maybe you even start to think that you can’t do anything other than this, because you’ve been doing this for so long — and maybe even you’re not worth any more than this.”
Solstad, though, eventually hit a breaking point. She said something happened three years ago that was “the worst thing” that had ever experienced. While she didn’t get into specifics, the event rocked her to the core.
“I remember actually falling down on my knees, praying to God so hard that my knuckles turned white,” she said. “‘Please, please don’t let this happen. Please, please make this OK. Make it all better. Reverse time. Please, please don’t let this happen.'”
Solstad continued, “But … He let it happen, and I was really, really mad at God for a long time.”
This led to resentment and frustration that really didn’t dissipate until about a year ago, when Solstad went to Italy and started looking at all of the art and beauty there, including church buildings.
And that experience changed her heart.
“Something started to change in me within these old churches and basilicas,” she said, noting that the image of Jesus on the cross in these churches caught her attention. “I started appreciating the artwork. It wasn’t just for its beauty, but … I started to think about the theology behind it, and the roles that different people play.”
From images of the cross to Mary, Jesus’ mother, Solstad found herself captivated. As time progressed, she became a Catholic and dove headfirst into her faith.
But the journey out of pornography wasn’t quite over.
“I’m still producing pornography at this point, and, so, I remember hearing one homily where they were talking about the evils of pornography,” Solstad recalled. “And I just kind of … wanted to sink into the pew. Like, it was awkward. … But I started really also examining my own life.”
Soon, she found herself disgusted by her professional career choice, finally realizing how wrong it was to participate and lead others astray. Solstad realized God didn’t want her to continue on her path of sin.
“God doesn’t want me producing pornography,” she recalled realizing.
The process wasn’t easy, as she had moments of wondering where she would make money if she couldn’t find a job. Ultimately, though, she knew it was essential to leave porn behind.
“That was a little scary, but I knew that I wanted change,” Solstad said. “I knew that I wanted more God and less yuck.”
She has already seen her story impact countless lives of both people working in the porn industry and those looking to stop consuming adult content. The stories of life change and people finding faith, she said, have been absolutely “incredible.”
Watch her story above for more.
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